Mistakes

I have a big learning problem, learning from my experiences that is. I have to really go to the extreme and be completely smashed to bits before I understand, that maybe I have made a mistake going down this path. It’s still a maybe. And by the time I realise it, I have already invested so much energy and time into the task it sort of becomes a point of no return. Because even when you return you are just not the same person anymore. Love life, academic life, work life, you name it I have made similar mistakes everywhere. I guess I am slow learner.

Aap Analogy Samajhiye

I believe I have the perfect analogy to describe this. Think about that time you went into kitchen in your house, your dad is cooking and are finally tall enough to reach the counter. You can reach for things, you can steal snacks, you can touch the hot pan. Never touch the hot pan! That’s what I should tell myself, but instead I don’t just touch the hot pan, I remove the pan and put my hand into the flame. If you think that’s a disturbing image, the feeling of doing something like that is no better. And there are left with special traits of the journey, like burns and marks that will last forever.

Mental Heatlh

So that’s what not learning from your experiences feels like. It’s incredibly shitty, and painful but I don’t regret any of it. I am mostly thankful for everything that came out of it. I am a better version of myself because of that. The bit that gets fucked up is how you react to things, deal with your feelings, trying to not close yourself up to new experiences because the pain is a sucks. But we shall persevere!

Growth

This is where I am also hopeful. I am lucky to have this awareness to come back to reality just before the point of no return. I have an amazing support system of people around me who help me get back to my life. And if there is something I want to take away from these crash (and burn) courses I keep opting into, is growing into a person who can not only accept the carefulness in doing things but find the right balance to take forward.

Cliff

It’s like opting for the most difficult path to knowledge, but when you reach there you know that you will never make the same mistakes again. It’s a Learnig Cliff which I believe first came in a XKCD comic, but I can’t seem to find the original one. If you do, please share with me too! Also you should check out XKCD, it’s brilliant! Until then..

TATA!

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